My day began with a feeling that today would NOT be the best of all possible worlds. F. Scott Fitzgerald said THERE ARE NO SECOND ACTS IN AMERICA, but his statement is widely misunderstood. Most people – including me, up til today, when I read an article about him – thinks this means that our brilliance is followed by eternal darkness. This is not what he was saying at all. What he DID mean relates to the idea of the classic three-act dramatic arc, specifically pertaining to tragedies, in that the second act sets up a conflict which results in the tragic results which are portrayed in the third act. What Fitzgerald was saying is that in America there IS no second act – we traverse from our lives as we wish them to be to our lives a utter catastrophe with no transition – with no mitigation. My day began in blissful ignorance of his sentiment. Camus said that YOU WILL NEVER BE HAPPY IF YOU CONTINUE TO SEARCH FOR WHAT HAPPINESS CONSISTS OF. YOU WILL NEVER LIVE IF YOU ARE LOOKING FOR THE MEANING OF LIFE. Like he knew what he was talking about. I mean the guy just sat on his ass in some cafe in Paris smoking cigarettes in that snobby way that the French have of holding their cigarettes, wearing a beret and acting like he was better than everybody else. He had a superiority complex, him and Sartre and all those other damned French existentialist intellectuals, riding around on bicycles and carrying baguettes and smoking Galouises and carrying on endlessly, spouting bon mot after bon mot, hangers-on fascinated – just FASCINATED – by their intellectual tidbits and breadcrumbs, just damn pontificating their moral superiority and the wisdom of their insights. Camus. Makes me sick. Ever read THE PLAGUE? Bunch of nonsense if you ask me. BUT WHO’S ASKING ME? It doesn’t matter, cos I’m writing this drivel, and you’re dumb enough to read it. I’m sorry – did I insult you just now? I beg your forgiveness. Can we get closure here? Can I get a witness? I think I’m getting off the subject. This is a constant here, so I guess I’M STICKING TO THE SUBJECT JUST FINE, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. Did you ever see ANIMAL HOUSE? I ask that for no particular reason. The world is divided into two camps – those that’ve seen ANIMAL HOUSE and those that haven’t. For those that’ve seen ANIMAL HOUSE, the world is divided into two further camps – those that liked it and those that didn’t. ANIMAL HOUSE is like a night where you close your windows and the sky becomes a crystal house where the windows glow and the moon shines through them, through the whole house and a single star beams down on a crystal cable and draws a line through the earth.